Five Ranbir Movies I Found Likeable
— and can be watched instead of ‘Animal’
Of late, I have started somewhat enjoying PMS — pre-menstrual syndrome. I can’t say I enjoy it in the literal sense, because owing to my health issues, it brings me excruciating pain — I cry, not just because I am emotional, but also because I am in unbearable pain; which only seems like will come to a halt in the form of death itself. But, what I have started is embracing these changes. Especially the emotional ones. I’ve started observing myself, and I have started loving talking to other women when they’re on their PMS — the emotional display and availability that time is just so beautiful to witness, receive, and participate in.
One thing I generally do for myself, when I am on my period, is that I isolate myself, and I just like to lose myself in movies. The more the depth, the better. And not ‘sad’ movies, but ‘drama’ genre — the movies that sometimes very comically, humourously show the depth of human relationships and emotions.
So, in this excruciating PMS (which I am experiencing currently, as I write this post) — it is killing me, both wrt physical pain, and emotional one too — still, in this PMS, I am also enjoying the emotional bursts inside me. And from that very emotional space — I compile this list of some beautiful Ranbir Kapoor movies that I watched in such times.
[I’ve also found myself gravitating toward men and male-lead movies/drama when I am on my period because looking at beautiful, wonderful women just creates this unbearable yearning that doesn’t allow comfort to co-exist. So, men to the rescue!]
1. Barfi
Since I am emotional today, and was part of a group that, surprisingly, spoke about emotions today, very surprisingly! I guess I’d like to highlight just how emotional this movie makes me feel. When I first saw this movie, I related it to Fried Green Tomatoes — a pretty famous WLW (Sapphic) movie. It had that famous scene Barfi copied of throwing food out of the train for the needy/refugees — I couldn’t find it on YouTube but I hope some Lesbian women know what I am talking about.
So, this movie, Barfi, too became a Lesbian movie for me. Ha ha.
All the more because I ended up dating someone who gave me this really cute compliment referring to one of the scenes of the movie where Ranbir’s character tests the two women he loves, for how much they love him, by taking them through a scare. He takes them to this light pole and arranges for it to fall, possibly on them — him and the woman. Although the first one (played by Ileana D’cruz) gets scared and backs off, the second one (played by Priyanka Chopra) remains standing with him. My ex told me I am like the second woman. That she tests her partners (mostly by annoying them to great extents) and many leave, but I stood with her throughout. It’s not surprising, then, that our relationship with each-other was each of ours longest relationship too. I am glad she knew she was testing me. We all test each-other, sometimes even without knowing. I wonder what might be the tests I put my loved ones through.
2. Jagga Jasoos
I absolutely loved this movie. While people complained that it was too long, it always felt so short to me.
I wouldn’t lie though, the movie ended abruptly, and had no clear ending either it seemed. Very weird and emotionally unfulfilling ending — for a movie full of implicit messages of so much emotion.
Anyway, again, one of those movies about imperfect people finding love in each-other. Not just as partners, but as parent (guardian) and child, and friends. Very very different than the mainstream Bollywood movies, that demand people to be perfect, to be able to find love — of any form, with parents or lovers.
The one thing I absolutely loved about this movie is how time feels so stretched when you’re longing for someone you love — a parent in this case. And how short it feels when you’re actually with them — again the parent.
I grew up with my Masy (maternal-aunt), and whatever time I got to spend with her seemed short to me. And time away from her, it was like a death-sentence to be honest. Years later, I learnt that, so was it for her. I learnt that the days she couldn’t visit us (my sibling and I) at our parents’ home (due to family discord), she would wait below our balcony to catch a glimpse of us. I have no doubt now, why I am crazy…it is in my genes! Feeling moderately is *unpossible* for this family. Loving, longing, yearning — it’s gigantic. Maybe she was on her PMS too when she did that? Who kows. But if she was, it would just add to my belief that women are just even more awesome and beautiful on their PMS.
3. Tamasha
I liked this movie as well, but, probably not for the reasons it was famous for. While it became famous for showing a man transitioning from his corporate career to a more artistic one, his true calling, this really wasn’t all that that captured me. There were subtler themes in this movie that I felt very attached to and resonated deeply with.
First and foremost, the female desire. I mean why do all Bollywood movies show men chasing and stalking women? Women do that too! Not to a creepy extent, but we feel love and longing too. It drives us to action as well! I loved the whole storyline of Ranbir leaving a book behind and Deepika finding that it was from a ‘SOCIAL’ — a popular chain of cafes. Anyway, not SOCIAL but the fact that Deepika took the pains of finding the man she fell in love with, or was in-awe of, or was obsessed with…whatever… She went and went and went again, till one day, she actually saw him there, at the SOCIAL, finally!
I don’t know about straight women, but I know a few Lesbians, including myself, who have done that, at least once in our lives. And guess what — I guess I know one straight woman who has too — my aforementioned aunt, who did this for these little nieces she loved but was banned from meeting.
While mentioning my aforementioned aunt that I grew up with — I also would now move to the second thing about the movie that I loved. The fact that Ranbir went to some storyteller guy.
Often, we notice the big breakthroughs in our life — like how he changed his career. And we notice the obvious support-systems we have to help us through it — Deepika Padukone’s character in this case. But, we often overlook the things that help us survive the hard times. For Ranbir’s character, it was the storyteller baba. I, again, felt deeply about it, and deeply resonated with it because my aunt used to tell me bed-time stories every time I stayed with her. It took me far far away from the harsh reality of my life at my parents’ home. I found so much comfort in stories, and I am so happy that stories found a representation in this movie. I am sure stories are saviours for so many other kids, that’s why Amazon picked up right, it started by selling stories (books)!
4. Saawariya
Sanjay Leela Bhansali makes such good movies. I could devote a week of my life, if I could afford to, to just binge-watch his productions. But, I’d actually like to highlight Saawariya — especially drawing a parallel with another of Ranbir’s movie, Animal.
While in the movie Animal, Ranbir plays a ‘negative’ role — very loudly, in Saawariya, he’s this sweet, lovable boy. But, within that sweet lovable guy, he carries this strong negative emotion, probably built and expressed only toward the end. That’s what’s more likely to be true for people. We’re not all Black & White — and so loudly ‘bad’. We’re all bad, we all have bad parts. I love the negative character Ranbir plays in Saawariya and you wouldn’t know it has a negative tone till you watch the movie till the end.
Anyway, most of the popular media will show how selfless love is, but I love that this movie actually shows the other side of the truth too — that we become extremely selfish in love. Love is selfish. Period.
5. Rajneeti
And finally, a movie I watched in passing. Extremely complicated — because not only does it show how complex human emotions are, it adds a layer of complex human relationships to it. Especially in a delicate setting as that of an influential political family. It must be so difficult to be famous — to feel so seen all the time!
Still, I love how the movie subtly shows love, especially on men — stoic men.
All in all, I would give my resounding opinion that Ranbir Kapoor has done some wonderful roles. It is extremely sad that he was not accepted and praised for those by the audiences at large. It just represents the parts of ourselves that we’re okay accepting — we accept and love this powerful bad-ass angry bad boy who achieves whatever he wants — gravely suppressing his own daddy-issues.
However, we refuse to acknowledge parts of ourselves that fall in love with imperfect women; like Barfi — falls in love with a perfect woman, doesn’t work out, falls in love with an imperfect woman who loves him back. We don’t want to acknowledge how much we want the love and admiration of our elders, our guardians, and especially our parents! How Jagga from Jagga Jasoos longs for his (adoptive) father’s company — very overtly, and reaches out to find him. How he ends up liking a woman just like his father — could there be a better way to represent attachment theory?
We don’t acknowledge how women can love too and make efforts to pursue that love. We’re still lost in the 90s Bollywood where men are harassing women to fall in love with them. No! We don’t need an ‘Animalistic’ love, where the woman falls in love with a man because he’s repeatedly abusing her — or giving mixed messages — sometimes abusing, some times love-bombing (could there be a better summary of a toxic-relationship?). We need a movie and a reality like Tamasha, where a woman falls in love (with a man) just because she had a great time with him, followed by good sex.
I don’t know if we need a Saawariya, but I’d volunteer myself for it. I would love to get in touch with those ‘shadow’ parts of myself that long to and act-on ruining someone else’s chances with another person just because I believe that I have loved them more, and that I can love them better.
And lastly, maybe someone needs to teach all of us to be able to receive love — in small doses, as portrayed by Rajneeti. Love is a very complicated emotion, and often has been represented with over the top gestures. What it’s done to all of us, as a collective audience, is that it has increased our threshold. Or if I may use some technical language, it has increased our ‘tolerance’. It’s like alcohol consumption. Our body doesn’t respond unless we get a major quantity of it inside. Just like the media has told us love should be. We don’t register the small small ways someone gives us their love on a day to day basis — in gestures, and in words. I am so guilty of this myself.
I hope I can go on a detox, unlearn what I have been conditioned for, and slowly, learn better things — especially on my PMS days — when I am perhaps the most emotionally open I ever will be — to be able to absorb any small dose of love (or hate) that comes my way! :)
